The Matriarch
In the last entry of the Doll Personality/Archetype series, I am revealing the MOTHER of all archetypes: The Matriarch. Due to its extensive nature, I will be using multiple examples of who she is and what she embodies. Rather than the modern “mother” term, I am going back to a real analysis of an actual Matriarch in the family, as well as a nod to the “mom friends” that may take on this role.
Authoritative
Clair Huxtable
The most recognizable trait of a mother is an adherence to rules. This isn’t to say that permissive women lack a maternal bone in their bodies. However, this is to say that your typical Matriarch does not wander too far outside of her standards. This is the archetype that stands on business the most.
I also want to mention the various parenting styles. Authoritative is not to be confused with the authoritarian parenting style. In this archetype, authoritarian “Mothers” are a result of letting the rules become black or white with no in-between.
To maintain the status quo, the Matriarch has to be strict not only with herself but with everyone around her. With that stereotype existing, sometimes she can go too far with her children.
A good example is Sheryl Lee Ralph from Sister Act 2.
She was so caught up in her fears and wanting the best for her daughter that she did not recognize her daughter’s dreams and squashed them up until the end of the movie! “Singing does NOT put food on the table!”
If you fit the Matriarch archetype, it is necessary to remember that everyone wasn’t raised with the same standards as you.
Have perspective for other people and where they come from. Just because it’s second nature to you, doesn’t mean that is the same for them.
Positive: provides structure
Negative: can be controlling and cold
2. Religious
In my archetype, religious themes are prevalent. The typical Mother depiction is someone religious and devout. In the South, that would be your Southern Belle “Proverbs 31 woman”.
At her most evolved, prays for herself and everyone else around her. She studies her faith and truly believes in it. She keeps her life a reflection of her belief system, and anything that strays too far outside of that is to be frowned upon.
At her least evolved, a lot of Matriarchs use religion as a weapon against their daughters, though. Lady Mae from the show Greenleaf is a perfect example of weaponizing religion as a manipulation tool. I highly recommend the show as it shows the layers of motherhood as it navigates through grief, jealousy, fear, and more.
“Promise me you're not here to sow discord in the fields of my peace." -Lady Mae Greenleaf to her daughter
Positive: a strong sense of values and morals
Negative: can cause religious trauma
3. Counselor
Evolved Matriarchs are natural counsels and give their advice… solicited or unsolicited. They are mentors to people of all ages. This is where Whitney Houston steps in. She was known to be a mentor to the R&B girls - specifically Brandy and Monica are her worthy protegees.
When the movie Sparkle was being made, Jordin Sparks reminisced that Whitney was almost like a real mother and very nurturing in her role as her mother. I will also shout out Whitney for helping create the Cheetah Girls movie behind the scenes and writing Lynn Whitfield as one of the best, wise Black moms on Disney television.
As a younger example, I will give a shoutout to Joan - the “Mom” friend of her friend group on the TV show Girlfriends. Joan was known to give her unsolicited advice and didn’t know her boundaries. Her worry stemmed from the earlier point of having a strict adherence to the rules. This inclination made her believe everyone should be like her when it comes to rules. This came at a detriment to her friendships because she enabled not only herself but also her friends.
When it comes to things you believe other people should do, you have to realize everyone isn’t like you. What is your truth may not be the same for others. Just because you hold a certain standard or value system for yourself, does not mean everyone else is the same.
Even if you mean well in your pursuit of being a counsel to everyone, you have to know your limits.
There is a deep need in most women to guide others and point them in the right direction. The more in tune you are with yourself, the easier it becomes to add your perspective whether the person receives it or not.
Positive: transformative to others
Negative: boundaries are hard to set
4. Poised
Diahann Carroll
The ideal Mother type is someone classy and poised. Not just in her demeanor, but in her appearance as well. Someone who is resting in their Mother energy will have an air of humility and grace about them.
She upkeeps her appearance, but is not vain in her appearance. She builds her own aesthetic, and makes sure it is cohesive. She cleans her space and recognizes her environment as sacred. She has a routine of getting the house and herself in order. She makes everyone around her feel safe, and stays down to Earth. She teaches when necessary, she curates a lifestyle of integrity, and she is the pinnacle of accountability and femininity.
The Look:
Regal Realness
The Look: Southern Belle
The Look: Mommy on the Go
The Look: Rich Mom Aesthetic
A more comprehensive mood board will be on my Pinterest, and more imagery of the Matriarch will be wrapped up in an upcoming project. Hope y’all enjoyed this series as much as I did. Stay tuned.
