Norma Jean

aka Marilyn Monroe

Marilyn Monroe effortlessly personifies the captivating essence of the Lover personality archetype, exuding an irresistible allure that enchants and mesmerizes all those who behold her. Her enchanting presence, dazzling beauty, and magnetic charisma combine to create an intoxicating aura that draws people towards her, igniting a romantic fervor within their hearts and awakening a deep longing for connection and affection.

Daydreamer (delulu)

The Lover is the person that is ready to move in with someone as soon as they meet them. They’ve already envisioned their potential. They are not grounded in reality. It takes a lot for the Lover to come back down.

Marilyn has been often referred to as a captivating daydreamer due to her enchanting ability to transport herself and others into the realm of imagination and fantasy. As Norma, she grew up impoverished and maligned. She had a broken family unit and endured trauma that ravaged her entire youth and stole it away.

Most people in this situation would fall victim to their circumstances, but Norma created Marilyn to cope. She escaped by dreaming of who she was to become.

“I daydreamed chiefly about beauty. I dreamed of myself becoming so beautiful that people would turn to look at me when I passed. And I dreamed of colors - scarlet, gold, green, white. I dreamed of myself walking proudly in beautiful clothes and being admired by everyone and overhearing words of praise. I made up the praises and repeated them aloud as if someone else were saying them.”

Marilyn used visualization and law of assumption before it was even a real thing. Visualization is one of the most powerful tools you can use to rewire your reality. You can rewire your reality by repetition of images and aesthetics you desire to see in your life. This includes affirmations and vision boards. Me, personally, I have a vision board on my laptop/desktop background and affirmations on each image. As someone who daydreamed “chiefly” as a child, it has its ups and downs. But that blind belief I had in myself paid off. What people would call “delulu”, daydreamers would just call the truth (lol).

Positive: creates a stable self concept

Negative: can become maladaptive

2. Codependent

This sounds like a negative trait, but it’s all about how you view it. The Lover doesn’t really like being alone. Intimacy is their deepest desire constantly. Sweethearts don’t mind it, and actually need it. But Lovers feed off of other people to feel sane. If they haven’t been around their favorite person in awhile, life becomes bleak. This becomes more extreme if they’re going through some hardships in life. Love is a human necessity, but it must be balanced.

Codependency with lovers can also show up in platonic relationships, where they accidentally/habitually fall into the people pleaser role. Sometimes, the Lover has plenty of people around them but can set themselves up for loneliness. Desiring closeness can make interactions feel empty if it doesn’t match the intensity a Lover personality sets on their own.

Positive: easily able to establish connections

Negative: prone to trauma bonds

3. Emotional

Lover Dolls are the most emotional of all of the Doll Archetypes. Their sister, the Sweetheart, has a better control on their emotions because their desire is to service the world whereas the Lover’s greatest desire is to be validated and needed. Their moods often shift and depend on other people and can bring them to a low point.

Even though Lovers are seen as playful and youthful, their passion for nearly everything can become unbelievably overwhelming and weigh them down.

Marilyn’s emotions plagued her so intensely from bipolar disorder. She had endometriosis and colitis. She took barbiturates to bring her down from her episodes. All of these things can lead to a very turbulent life internally and externally.

To feel so deeply can have its consequences. When a lot of your well being is dependent on receiving love you have never gotten, it creates instability. That’s why a lot of love has to be found within yourself. by discovering who you are outside what anyone else says.

This is why it’s good for anyone who fits the archetype of the Lover Doll to have expressive artistic hobbies that bring out the beauty in things such as: writing, painting, photography, fashion (and to keep it separate from work and not always monetized).

Positive: In touch with emotions and aware of emotions

Negative: emotions can control them, rather than the other way around

4. Siren

Marilyn has been duplicated numerous times in pop culture. From overlooked to notoriously emulated, she is one of the most recognizable sex symbols of all time. While this is true, many Lover Dolls have an irresistible display of gentleness and shyness. Lover Dolls aren’t going to go head first into things like the Vixen, they play it a bit more coy. They don’t like to take dominating roles for the most part.

This can cause the Lover Doll to have multiple sides to who they are in order to receive the attention they desire. This is why Marilyn is such a good example, because many were surprised that she wasn’t really who she portrayed herself to be.

“I’ll never forget the day Marilyn and I were walking around New York City, just having a stroll on a nice day. She loved New York because no one bothered her there like they did in Hollywood, she could put on her plain-Jane clothes and no one would notice her. She loved that. So, as we we’re walking down Broadway, she turns to me and says, ‘Do you want to see me become her?’ I didn’t know what she meant but I just said ‘Yes’ — and then I saw it. I don’t know how to explain what she did because it was so very subtle, but she turned something on within herself that was almost like magic. And suddenly cars were slowing, and people were turning their heads and stopping to stare. They were recognizing that this was Marilyn Monroe as if she pulled off a mask or something, even though a second ago nobody noticed her. I had never seen anything like it before.” - Amy Greene

I’ve spoken a lot on the trend “I’m HER”.

Becoming “HER” is more about the love you have for yourself.

What attracts you so much to the people you look up to is something that you are attributing to them. All of the aesthetics, glitz, and glam in the world you achieve is an influence but it won’t change that fact. Buying the same outfit or lace wig won’t change that. It’s a mentality. It’s an essence to embody. When you appreciate yourself and envision exactly who you KNOW you are, that’s HER. The aesthetic is you. The vibes are you.

When you finally realize the love you see all around you is something within YOU making it special, you will be unstoppable.

What we can learn:

If you can see it, you can believe it. If you have the vision to inspire yourself, you just need the discipline to execute it.
Assume your life is already on the way to its peak, and live as such.
Learn how to vibe by yourself, with yourself.

Closing questions to ask yourself:

What energy am I giving off?
What do I look like at my most loved?
How can I cultivate the love within myself?
What are things I’m looking for in others that I can find in myself?

Get The Look

Makeup: Sultry eye shadow, false eyelashes cut in half, white inner corners, wings to elongate the eye for a more “sleepy” effect, and red lipstick to accentuate the lips and make them more tantalizing, contoured lips, blush on tip of nose and beauty mark above lips

Clothes: “Marilyn” - fur trim, diamond, glitter, striking prints, “Norma” - cottagecore, domestic, feminine, classy, both with a bright color palette